To Be Saved
by TaylorRiley17
Summary: Kagome is a teen struggling with depression. Inuyasha is a half-demon plagued with self-hatred of his Half-Demon status and because of that has a distorted body image which has led him to an eating disorder. What will happen when these two meet? What happens when friends or family possibly find out? Can they be Saved? (Complete!)
1. Chapter 1

**Hello!**

**This will be based on experiences , my own, or what I've researched. If anyone has a problem with eating disorders, depression, self-harm, suicidal thoughts and feelings, then this is not for you.**

**Yes, I may or may not have one or all of the above mentioned things. I'm...mostly open about it so if you really want to know , message me and I will answer if I can. I understand some people don't understand or are just curious. If you are going to message me , please keep in mind i may not answer, somethings are very personal but I will try. If you message me and are going to say negative things, the i warn you i will not respond. **

**I also want to state that if anyone on here is going through something, I will gladly be happy to PM with you just to listen or to help. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.**

**Rewritten and Revised: 4-28-2013**

* * *

_**Kagome's P.O.V**_

_Beep, Beep, Beep! _

I groan as I shut my alarm off._ And here we got, _I think sadly to myself. I get up and head to the bathroom begrudgingly to get ready for school. I pull on a purple hoodie 2 sizes too big for me along with a pair of black yoga pants, and to finish it off slide on a pair of my favorite sneakers. I brush my hair quickly and then put it in a messy bun. I give myself a small smile._ Maybe today will be different!_ I think positively. I pull down my sleeves, not wanting anyone to notice last night's mistakes, grab my backpack and head to school.

_I don't need breakfast, I'm fat enough as it is._

* * *

_**At School**_

"KAGS!"

I turn and look not surprised as my best friend, Sango, rushes up to me and squeezes me into one of her death hugs. I wince as she brushes my wrist, but I pay no mind to it, not wanting her to notice. She finally releases me and I give her a big grin.

"Sango, one of these days you're going to kill me with one of those hugs!" I laugh. I pull down my sleeves subconsciously as I smile at her.

"Anyways, how was your weekend Kags?" She asks. I barely miss a beat giving her the same answer I usually give her.

"Great as always, how bout you sweets?" I reply back.

"Wonderful! Miroku asked me to be his girlfriend!" She exclaimed excitedly! I laughed and gave her a quick hug.

"About time that boy asked you out! You guys have been best friends for a year now, and although he's a bit lecherous, I could tell he obviously had a thing for you."

"Yeah...him and his.." She pauses.

"Cursed hand" We finish together as we pretend to shudder in thought of his cursed hand.

That boy had a thing for groping butts and it would be the down fall of him someday.

Miroku came to Shikon High last year and we immediately included him in our group. He was funny, a bit perverted, but a sweet guy when it came down to it. He was a great friend and I'm glad that they finally decided to make it official, since all that anyone ever feels was the sexual tension, those two created. I smirked inwardly at my thoughts, then plunged back into reality when Miroku came up and hugged me , then Sango.

"Hello Kags and to you also my sweet." He turned his attention to Sango and winked. She growled playfully at his words. I couldn't help but roll my eyes. _They're perfect for each other._

"Hey Roku."

"Did you guys hear that there's a new student this year!" Miroku stated.

Me and Sango blinked shocked. Not many people transfer to Shikon High, we were surprised Roku came last year. We shrugged at him and then we walked to class, curious about who would transfer to Shikon?

* * *

_**Inuyasha P.O.V**_

"Get up" A cold voice sounded in my room. I rolled over and looked up to see my brother, Sesshomauru , standing over me , glaring, then leaving me to get dressed as I frowned and got up.

It was just me and Sesshomauru ever since my mom and dad died. My mother in childbirth, my father from enemies a long time ago. He was the Great Dog Demon of the West, and Sesshomauru was well on his way to fullfilling our father's legacy...unlike me. I'm just a half-demon. A Hanyou, neither demon nor human. In between. I hated it .

I walked into the bathroom and once I looked in the mirror, I scowled. I looked horrible. I had silver long hair atop it were dog ears. I was always mercilessly teased for them. I hated them. I flattened them against my skull and smirked. _Better. _I frowned again when I saw my full body. I have way too much fat, I need to workout more I exercised for only 3 hours yesterday, I need to step it up.

I walked over to the toilet and went to do my daily routine. I stuck two fingers down my throat and gagged myself till the relief of vomit came rushing out of my mouth. After I finished I wiped my mouth and tried to steady my breathing. I threw some water on my face and quickly brushed my teeth.

_A few throw-ups a day keeps the fat away._


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I do not own. **

**Last time I'm doing a disclaimer. Ya'll know I don't own InuYasha. :( No need to rub it in.\**

**Revised and Rewritten: 4-28-2013**

* * *

**_Inuyasha's P.O.V_**

"Here's breakfast." The icy voice stated.

"I have to go get to school. You know the thing you graduated from 3 years ago." I said calmly and left for school. Keh bastard, he's a full demon just trying to show he's better than me. I'll show him. I rushed to school and tried to find my locker.

_Locker 526, 526...?_ I questioned going all through the lockers. Then there I see it, Locker 526. I open it and gather all my books and organize it. I close it and then my eyes meet those of a brilliant chocolate-brown. Black hair pulled up into a messy bun. She wore a large hoodie and although she looked quite plain, she seemed quite...beautiful. I snapped out of my thoughts when I heard her bell-like voice, my ears threatening to perk out from my attempt at hiding them.

"Hey! You must be one of the new students. My name is Kagome" She said brightly.

"Keh" I replied. I wasn't in the mood for mind games with a human girl.

The girl Kagome frowned, then smiled again, her face lighting up at her own idea.

"Well Keh, pleased to meet you!" She laughed a little to hardly.

I narrowed my eyes. _Something wasn't right. That laugh seemed extremely forced, maybe she is just jerking me around?_

Over-thinking her actions, I subconsciously un-flattened my ears and they perked up. I felt myself grew pale. I quickly flattened them against my head again. Here it comes the, the notice of me being a Hanyou, the name calling, and everything that happened when someone found out I was different from them. I braced myself for the worst when I was met with a shocking reaction.

Her mouth formed an "O" and her eyes widened in surprise, but she quickly composed herself and gave me a shy smile.

"Please don't flatten them, that must be uncomfortable and plus their really cute."

I saw her cheeks heat up at the last comment and I awkwardly looked away , but I felt...happy? She thought my ears were cute? She's accepting me?

"You're not repulsed...?" I questioned her.

She gave me an odd look and then her eyes lit up with a fierce fire in them.

"No? Why would I be repulsed? Because you have adorable ears? Doesn't that seem a bit ridiculous?" She asked confused.

" Well you know that means I'm a-."

Her eyes flashed with recognition with what I was saying. She looked down at the ground , her bangs covering her eyes. I nodded sadly, taking her sudden reaction as rejection and turned to walk away. I didn't even take 3 steps, when I felt a delicate hand grab my wrist and spin me around. I was face to face with the girl she was looking at me with something I couldn't place.

"You thought...I'd judge you...because you're a half demon." She stated, not asked.

I nodded my head ever so slighty. I couldn't form words. 'What is she saying?'

"I could care less if you're a Hanyou...you're new and one of my best friends was new last year, and I know he appreciated my other friend and I accepting him as a friend right away. I never once judged him and I will and wouldn't do the same to you. Please...would you tell me your name?"

There was such determination and strength in her words. I felt a lump in my throat. I was so overcome with emotion. I held back my tears of secret joy as I tried and pushed away any thoughts as of now that held insecurity and doubt.

"My name's Inuyasha"

She smiled a beautiful genuine smile.

"I can tell we are going to get along amazingly Inuyasha. Come on, I'll introduce you to my friends! Oh look we have the same schedule!" She said brightly.

That's all I could do was smile as this beautiful mysterious girl led me to first period, allowing a small smile to grace my lips as we walked.

* * *

Sesshomauru's P.O.V

_'He skipped breakfast again'_ I thought curiously. My half-brother never seemed to eat breakfast anymore, and barely anything at dinner. I grimaced slightly at the remembrance of hearing retching sounds coming from his bathroom. _'Maybe he is sick?'_ I cursed myself. Demons , even Half-Demons never get sick and I didn't smell any sickness coming off of him. I dismissed my thoughts of him as I got ready to leave.

_This Sesshomauru has no reason to worry about something revolving around Inuyasha._


	3. Chapter 3

**Double Chappie Update!**

* * *

Chapter 3: It's an Unescapable Void, Depression Is

Kagome's P.O.V

"Sango! Roku! This is Inuyasha, he's new." I stated simply, keeping a small grin on my face, as I pulled Inuyasha next to me. He gave a half-smile and introduced himself.

"Hi! My name's Sango nice to meet you, OH MY GOD YOUR EARS ARE FRIGGEN ADORABLE" She screamed in glee. Inuyasha looked away uncomfortable but not saying any disapproval at her words.

"Hello, Inuyasha my name is Miroku, but my close friends call me Roku" He kindly decreed. Inuyasha nodded and they both fist-bumped.

We both started comparing schedules and we all had at least 3 classes together with one another, but only me and inuyasha had the same schedule. We began all lightly chatting when Roku brought up a question to Inuyasha.

"Hey, I heard you have a brother attending here also, is that true?"

"Yes, my older brother Sesshomauru is also starting, he's a senior and he'll be in later he has late in." he stated rather dully.

They nodded, not pressing the issue since he didn't seem to have a good relationship with him. The bell was about to ring when I felt the burning in my wrist enhance twentyfold. I held back showing signs, not wanting my friends to notice I was upset. I told Sango to tell the teacher, I had to go to the bathroom, she nodded and agreed. As I left I caught a glimpse of Inuyasha stiffening and I felt his eyes bore into my back as I quickly made my escape.

I ran to the bathroom and rushed in and pulled up my sleeves. They were bleeding profusely and I quickly ran them under cold-water. The contrast between the burning cuts and the icy water sent shivers and shots of pain ringing through my arms. As the blood finally stopped I grabbed a paper towel and quickly dried the cuts. They weren't bleeding anymore, but I stared at the mistakes that plagued my wrists and arms. I lightly traced them, remembering each time I did it , the control, the pain, the pleasure I felt when I dragged each scissor blade across my skin.

I immediately started to feel the effect of the depression hit me again. Looking at them, remembering how I felt. It made me sick with wanting, like a druggie that needs it fix. I struggled against doing it for a few moments when I felt the need multiply. I needed to do it.

I reached in my backpack and pulled out my old pair of blue scissors. I opened it up, so one of the blades could be used and placed it against the flesh of my stomach. I dragged it across in little semi-deep motions. Not enough to kill me but enough to feel, to remember I'm alive. I did it for a good 3 minutes till my whole stomach was covered in little cuts. Some in X's, some in straight lines, some even diagonally. It didn't matter, the only thing that mattered was the feeling of the release i got. This was my high.

I rinsed the blade off and put it back in its secret compartment in my bag. I got a paper towel and rinsed off my cuts and wiped them clean. It stung even more having something rub them. They eventually stopped bleeding and I pulled my hoodie back down concealing my recent actions of pain. I quickly rushed back to class and apologized to the teacher , saying I had gotten sick. The teacher excused it and I sat down next to Inuyasha and Sango.

Sango gave me a concerned look, I smiled and mouthed that I was fine. She smiled satisfied with my answer and turned back to the teacher. I turned and faced inuyasha and he just had this look of contemplation clearly on his face, like he was having an internal battle with himself. I gave him my best bright fake smile I always gave Sango. His eyes saddened even more and he turned back to the board. I pulled my sleeves down even more and turned to the board also, feeling better yet guilty as hell.

Like always.

* * *

Inuyasha's P.O.V

I waited anxiously for her return. She left for the bathroom 15 minutes ago! And I smelled blood! I shrugged of the thought of Kagome being hurt. I didn't want to think about it. I felt my stomach growl and i felt a bit fatigued. I ignored it, I hadn't eaten in a few days and I felt great. I wasn't going to let hunger get in the way of me proving myself. I tried to pay attention but felt it useless. Then she walked in.

She whispered something to the teacher and the teacher nodded and she rushed to her seat next to me and Sango. I stiffened inwardly. She still smelt of blood. I felt her turn towards me and I felt like I should say something...ask if she was okay? What if she was like Rin? I turned to her and she gave me the biggest fakest smile , I had ever seen. I instantly saddened even more. She truly was hurting. I couldn't bear to see her look at me with that fake smile, so I turned back to the board and tried to ignore the pounding headache that decided to show up.

* * *

**I just wanted you all to know, that this chapter...well...it was a struggle writing. I hope it isn't too bad. **


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Observations

Inuyasha's P.O.V

Lunch eventually rolled around and I sat with Kagome, Roku, and Sango. I really enjoyed their company and they seemed to accept me. I was starting to enjoy the prospect of friends. We sat down at the table and they all went to get lunch. When they came back they noticed, i didn't have anything to eat. They looked at me curiously, probably wondering why I wasn't eating. I felt myself grow uncomfortable. 'Oh god they won't make me eat will they? I am doing so well...I won't let them ruin me!' i thought sincerely.

"Not hungry." I mumbled at them hoping that would appease their curious stares.

"Are you sure, Yasha? I mean I could share some of my food?" said a tray filled Sango. I smiled and assured her I was fine and just wasn't hungry. I looked and saw Kagome picking at a Salad. I saw she would talk, and before she would take a bite , she'd keep talking and then put down her fork. Making it look like she was eating, but never taking a bite. Miroku and Sango never noticed, but I did.

It's something I would do. That i do, I corrected myself.

They went to throw out their trays and I waited at the table.

Wondering why Kagome, never once took a bite.

* * *

Kagome's P.O.V

The bell rang and school was dismissed for the day. I met Inuyasha at his locker to say goodbye, when he asked me a question I wasn't ready for.

"Why didn't you eat at lunch?" he asked nonchalantly.

I felt my face turn pale and i looked away.

'I ate, I don't know what you're talking about Inuyasha." I stated dully.

He looked at me with a blank expression, except for sad eyes.

"yeah..sure sure...see you tomorrow Kagome..take care...and by the way..thank you...so much." he said , voice filled with emotion.

" Yeah..no problem." I smiled.

I ignored the slight rumbling in my stomach as I made my way home.

When I reached the door to my house , I ran up to the bathroom and lifted my shirt up. I lightly touched with my hand the cuts that plagued my stomach. They were still fresh so they stung a bit but the feeling of them...it felt...real. A knock sounded at the door and I quickly pulled my shirt down and opened the door.

It was my mom, smiling down at me. She excused herself and said she needed the bathroom. She gave me a quick hug and then whispered in my ear if I had weighed myself yet. She was always on me about my weight and if i was losing. I nodded and told her of my loss of 4 pounds. She hugged me and said 'keep up the good work' . I quickly made it to my room and shut the door and slid down it, feeling tears prick my eyes.

I crawled to my bed and let the tears fall, till sleep overtook me.

I dreamt of being pretty.

I dreamt of being skinny.

I dreamt of my new friend, Inuyasha.

But most importantly...

I dreamt of being happy.

* * *

**Sorry it was so short, extremely tired but wanted to give you guys something!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Ahh Finals, are done thank gods! My brain is a bit mushy from all the finals, but I hope not too mushy because here is a brand new chappie! :)**

**IncompetantNothings:Here is you're update. LOL. I'm glad you enjoy this story and I'm glad this seems new to you! I wanted to try and bring something fresh to the table of Inuyasha fanfiction! Thank you for reviewing lovely3 **

**IllaynaBliss: I have already PM'd you but again I am sorry that , you have such a connection to that. I understand completely as I have told you in our PM. Thank you for reviewing lovely.3**

* * *

****_~*Chapter 5:A Feeling of WeightlessNess_~*

Inuyasha's P.O.V

I arrived at home , and saw Sesshmauru already home. I didn't question how he got here so fast, I just went up to my room. Oblivious to the slight concern on his face. I ran up to the bathroom and gagged myself till I felt the relief of the vomit. I wiped my mouth and brushed my teeth , trying to rid myself of the horrid taste in my mouth. I glanced in the mirror and frowned. I lifted up my shirt and frowned even more. Fat. There it was. The sick flab of skin hanging from my stomach area. I pulled down my shirt, I didn't want to look at the disgusted protrusion from my body.

I exited the bathroom and flopped down onto my bed. I got under the covers and closed my eyes as I began to dream of my new friends. Espcially Kagome. Her beautiful chocolate eyes that just shined with smile was gone from my face as I remembered how she lied to me in class. Saying how she was okay, when I clearly knew she wasn't. And the smell of blood that clung to her , was extremely concerning. She didn't deserve to have any sadness in her life, considering she seemed to be a ball of light in mine. The first person to ever show me kindness. My first friend.

I remembered smelling the blood on her wrists and from her stomach area. I tried thinking of what it could possibly be. I sighed in frustration.

Of course I knew why she was bleeding...Like I thought earlier. She...was probably like Rin.

Rin. I sighed in sadness thinking of the sweet girl, who is in a hospital right now because of her issues. She was Sesshomauru's girlfriend of 2 years. How a girl like her could fall for such an Ice prince, beats me, but they were together. She made my brother happy and vice versa. She seemed to be such a joy, always smiling, always kind. I considered her to be an almost friend, since she would also be kind to me and seemed to not be disgusted with my presence. But that all changed, when 5 months ago, she attempted suicide. She tried OD'ing on Pills and then slit her wrists in the bathtub. Sessh got a call later that evening from the hospital. He of course rushed right there.

He found out that she was cutting herself. Self-mutilation, cutting, self-harm, whatever you wanna call it. There were cuts all down her wrists, on her upper thighs, and on her stomach. Even the Ice Prince couldn't contain his shock. That was the only time I ever saw him show that much emotion. He shed tears for his human girlfriend. He promised her to seek help and she agreed and now she's at behavioral institution for severe depression.

I'm glad Rin got the help she needed. Sessh said she was doing a lot better and would be released in a month or two. I even recieved a few letters from her, saying how she was and such. I shook my head from those thoughts. I didn't want that to be the case with Kagome. She...doesn't deserve to feel the need to...to ruin her body like that. With cuts marring over her body. I sighed and made a decision.

I would confront her tomorrow about it. I needed to do something.

I needed to save her, before it's too late.

* * *

Kagome's P.O.V

I woke up the next morning feeling completely shitty.I sighed and got up , beginning to get ready for school. I pulled on a black hoddie with black sweatpants , hair in my usual ponytail. I mad emy way downstairs, and my stomach growled. I felt so empty...maybe breakfast wouldn't hurt since I lost 4 pounds. I proceded to make a bagel when my mother sauntered over to me and tsk'ed.

"Kaggie baby, isn't there a better choice to eat?" Something not so...fattening?" She asked in aslightly annoyed tone. I frowned and then grabbed a bowland poured some cereal. She beamed at me , obviously praising me for the correct choice in her eyes. I sighed as I ate my cheerios but none the less pleased food was entering my body. I finished my bowl and put in the sink, kissed my mother goodbye and headed to her school. I plastered on my fake smile for the day so my friends wouldn't worry.

_At School..._

__I gathered my books from my locker and as I shut it met face to face with amber eyes. I smiled.

"Hello Inuyasha, What's up?" I asked chipperly.

He looked at me funnily and then whispered, " Can we talk in private?"

I nodded getting a sinking feeling in the pit of my gut.

He pulled me into a janitor's closet and turned on the light.

"Kagome...can you please roll up your sleeves?" He asked me in a calm sad voice.

I turned pale. No...He can't know.

"Why?" I asked defensively.

"Please don't get defensive...please...I won't judge. Just...please Kagome." He pleaded.

I took a deep shaky breath and lifted up my sleeves.

* * *

**And cliffhanger...sorry. Hopefully that was alright and realistic. If not...i apologize...i tried. My brains a little mushy from finals as i mentioned. If you have any MAJOR descrepincys.( see i can't even spell that ) Then please don't hesitate to tell me. :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks for the Reviews! **

**Some credit to this chapter goes to IncompetantNothings for helping for some of the plot this chapter. Thanks, Lovely. :)**

* * *

Chapter 6: The Revealed and The Hidden

Kagome's P.O.V

I saw Inuyasha's face drop as he saw the scars and cuts that made up my arm. There were barely any spaces left for anymore cuts. Some were deep, some were just scratches. They were hideous, yet they were beautiful. They showed pain, yet they showed a survivor. I hated them , but part of me never wanted them to disappear. They were a part of me, a part of me I never thought I'd show someone. And here I was showing a boy , I barely know something so sacred , so...personal.

I felt the tears stream down my face as I watched his face contort with empathy. He showed such understanding , I didn't know was possible. Yet I felt defensive. Like part of him was judging me, and criticizing me.

I snapped.

"What? Let me guess, you feel sorry for me? Well, I don't want pity!" I snarled.

I snatched my arms back and rolled the sleeves down, and went to stomp off when he lightly grabbed my upper arm. He spun me around so I faced him. I flinched at the semi-anger that showed on his face.

"I care about you Kagome. You are an important person to me, and I don't want to see you in pain. I...I can't lose you. You...have such a light about you. You deserve so much happiness, Kagome." He said softly.

"I deserve nothing." I stated coldly.

He flinched at my coldness , and his ears drooped. I felt bad , I was yelling at him but it was better this way. I'm no good for him. I'm no good for anyone.

"You deserve so much, Kagome." He began softly. " You may not see it, but everyone who knows you can see it. You're the light in a dark tunnel, Kags." He ended with a small smirk.

I began to shake and then I just broke down.

I began to sob uncontrollaby in his arms and he held me close, tightly yet softly. Assuring me he wasn't going anywhere. I let myself fall apart in his arms, and he just held me. Didn't say anything else, just held me.

After a half an hour passed, we left the closet, and I felt better. Not 100%. But a lot better than I was. He smiled at me and took my hands.

"Kags, Promise me you won't harm yourself again." He stated with a firm calm voice.

I agreed, and I just hoped to Kami, I could follow through.

Day 1 of Recovery began tomorrow.

* * *

Inuyasha's P.O.V

3 days later...

I felt a lot better knowing Kagome , promised me she wouldn't self-harm again. I shuddered remembering the cuts that plagued her wrists and couldn't even begin to fathom the cuts that plagued her other body parts. Sess started to get suspicious of my frequent bathroom trips, and how I don't eat in front of him.

_Flashback..._

_"Inuyasha...why do you not eat supper with me anymore?" Sesshomauru asked coldly. _

_I didn't feel offended with his cold tone, it was his natural voice so I didn't let it bother me. I was bothered by the fact, he was noticing. He never notices. Why does he even care? _

_I shrugged._

_"I just am never hungry when you eat." I stated nonchalantly. _

_"Hnnn..." He hummed. _

_"Can I go now, Please? " I asked impatiently. He gave me a curious look, but nodded his head, dismissing me. He mentioned something about homework as I sprinted to my room , and I yelled back a 'Sure, Sure.'_

_As soon as I got in my room, I locked the door, and pulled out a bin with loads of food. I felt my stomach growl its approval, as I snarfed down the cakes and candy. I binged for a good half an hour , when I finally felt satisfied. Too satisfied. _

_I made sure my door was locked and pulled out a bin. Sess was in the shower, so I couldn't go to my first place I would have chosen. I turned on my stereo and turned it to high volume. Then I used the bin to vomit in. I stuck my fingers down my throat, till vomit overflowed into the bucket. It was quite disgusting, yet satisfying. It smelled nasty though. I was about to take it to the trash, and get rid of the bin and the evidence altogether when I heard a knock at the door. _

_"Inuyasha?" An icy voice questioned outside my door. _

_Shit. Sesshomauru. I quickly shoved the bin under my bed and sprayed a heck of a lot air freshener. I unlocked the door and opened it. _

_"Yes?"_

_He stared at me suspiciously and raised an eyebrow._

_"I heard...unpleasent noises coming from in here." _

_Shit._

_"Just my music, sorry bro." I tried. He raised an eyebrow at the mention of bro, but didn't say anything else. He nodded curtly and left. _

_I sghed relief as I shut my door. _

_I then waited till I knew he was asleep and then walked to the garbage dumpster and disposed of the evidence. _

_This._

_Will._

_Make._

_Me._

_Closer._

_To._

_Perfection._

_End Flashback..._

'I've never felt better' I lied to myself.

* * *

Sess's P.O.V

I knew what I had to do.

I have confirmed my suspicions for the most part.

I picked up the phone and dialed the one person, who may be able to save him.

"Rin. I need your help, love."

* * *

**I know Sess is OOC but hey that's okay! It's all for the story. :) **

**Hope you Enjoyed!**


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7: Recovery isn't an Easy Road

Kagome's P.O.V

It's been a total of five days...five days since I've cut. The thought of self-harm terrifies me yet it makes me calm and needy. I need to cut. I search for my scissors when I remember Inuyasha took them.

"Shit" I mutter to myself.

I start to breathe heavily as I try to calm down. I feel myself slowly starting to give in as I frantically tear my room apart looking for some sort of blade. I can't. I start to look at my old scars and I feel so triggered. The thought of them fading seems horrifying, they're apart of me. They can't fade...they..they can't.

I find a back to an earring and i frown at how...unsharp the object of my use is going to be , compared to what I normally use. I drag it hard against my wrists and sigh in relief as i feel the pain and see a slow trickle of blood. I laugh to myself at how crazy I must seem. Using an earring back to cut myself. I drag it even harder across and I barely even blink as the skin opens up a lot deeper then what I am used to. I could get use to this, I think as I drag it across a few more times and look at the deep bloody gashes cascading down my arm. I quickly dash to the bathroom to wash off my cuts and run them under icy cold water. I flinch as the water makes contact with my arm, but hold it there none the less. I can't help but feel better as I wrap my arm up, in case my cuts begin to bleed again.

I quickly snuggle back into bed and fall asleep with a satisfied, yet dissapointed smile.

* * *

Inuyasha's P.O.V

Sess has been acting strange. He watches me with weary eyes and with much observation. I've been forced to eat with him at dinner time and he always seems to walk in my room and use the bathroom.

"What am I going to do?" I whisper scared of myself gaining back the weight I just lost. I start to pace my room thinking of ways I can get rid of this food. I think for what seems like hours till I think of an idea.

"Sess!" I yell as I run down the stairs. "I'm going to a friend's house!" I fly out the door before he can say another word and I run to the nearest resteraunt. I fling open the bathroom door and in there and purge 4 times before I feel satisfied enough. I sigh with satisfaction. I have to make it seem like I'm gone for awhile so I decide to pay Kagome a visit.

As fast I can I make my way to Kagome's.

I know she'll cheer me up, I think to myself happily.

I ignore the fuzzy spots in my vision and try to shake them off as I meet the pavement and am greeted by the cold darkness.

* * *

Rin's P.O.V

It's been a week since I've gotten Sesshy's worried phone call. I can't believe he thinks Inuyasha has an eating disorder, but from what he's told me, he has all the signs. I feel a tear slide down my face as I think of sweet Inuyasha. He was such a sweet kid and he deserved so much more than life handed him. I walked to the bathroom and looked in the mirror. I saw a girl with big brown eyes that held sparks of life in them, unlike before. I see long brown/black hair that is so much more healthier than it was before. And lastly, I see more curves and weight on me than before. I flinch as I remember my weight was 65 llbs, when I came here. Now it is a much healthier 100 llbs. I was surprised at how much weight I gained so fast, I was freaked out at first but with therapy I realized it was okay and that weight was perfectly healthy for me. i could even gain a little more!

My lips turned into a small smile, I was much happier than I was say 6-8 months ago. Now I am so much happier and I no longer starve/purge/ and or self-harm. I sighed sadly as I looked at the scars that would adorn my legs, arms, and stomach. Some were more noticable than others but it still served as a reminder or how truly upset and sad I was. How society corrupted me, how my family influenced my mind. I shuttered and shook out the bad thoughts and returned a smile to my face.

I flopped down onto my bed and was so happy I was home at last. Released 4 days ago from the hospital I have already felt better. Sesshy knew I was being released soon so when he asked me to come talk to Inuyasha, I of course agreed but asked if I could come home for a while , before I talked to him. Or course, he had no objections but wished for me to come soon. I remembered how sad and anxious he seemed. I remember also being a little shocked that the usually stoic demon was so emotion-filled. The only time I remember hearing/seeing such emotion was when he came to the hospital after my attempt. I shuttered thinking of his face contorted with pain like that.

I was visiting Inuyasha tomorrow. I had to save him, I had to save him like Sess saved me.

He needs to be saved.

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**Sorry if this wasn't good. Been a horrible long week. **

**Hope you enjoyed , lovelies. **


	8. Chapter 8

**I'm getting some reviews yay!**

**Thank you to everyone that reviewed or followed the story , favorited so forth! :)**

**You guys keep me writing , because I have horrible attention span for writing and i get easily bored. So your reviews keep me interested and focused!**

**Don't forget to check out my other fanfic "Awakening" It's a lot lighter and I hear that my OC is quite awesome and funny, so go check it out! **

**I go back to school tomorrow so this might be my last update till the weekend. I know I have an essay to write this week...:( so this might be it for awhile. But I will try! **

**Anyways onwards with the story!**

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Chapter 8: A Blacking Out and A Visiting Friend

Inuyasha's P.O.V

I woke up with a lot of pains and many bright lights. I was surrounded by them and I noticed something was lodged in my arm.

An I.V.

So that means...I was in the hospital. I remember walking to Kagome's house...and then nothing. So who found me...what happened? I started to panic and I heard the heart monitor go up at my elevated heart rate. A nurse came in and automatically asked me if anything was wrong.

"I need to go." I said weakly. I felt so weak, but I couldn't stay here! God, Sess is going to kill me. What about Kagome? What about Miroku and Sango? Surely they will notice If i'm gone from school. I tried to pull the IV out , but the nurse stopped me, and pushed away my hand.

"Please stop , mister Inuyasha...your brother is going to be here in a few minutes. Please try and stay calm. Everything will be alright." She said soothingly.

She left and I layed there defeated and weak. How am I supposed to get stronger when I can't work out? I haven't worked out in a few days...although I have purged, I thought to myself, remembering how I left the house yesterday to purge at a nearby resteraunt.

Suddenly the door clicked open and there stood Sess, his face not very stoic, actually it seemed quite angry, yet some other emotion was there, although I couldn't place what it was.

"Inuyasha...what has been going on?" He asked icily. The venom was there but it didn't seem angry, somehow. What was his deal?

"Sorry, i tripped and I guess it was quite a fall. " I answered fast. He frowned and narrowed his eyes clearly knowing I was lying.

"Inuyasha...do you know why you're here?" He asked.

I nodded.

"I tripped." I said calmly.

"No. You didn't trip." He spat. I flinched and he took a deep breath. " Sorry, I mean Inuyasha , you didn't trip. You're here because you fainted due to lack of food. You haven't been eating." He states.

"Why?" He asks in a weird tone.

"Because." I whisper, not wanting him to know how i feel.

"GOD DAMMIT INUYASHA!" He screeches. I blink and look away. He rubs his eyes and pushes some hair out of his face.

"I know you haven't been eating. You never eat and if you do, you always seem to go to the bathroom right away. You seem to be going to take out your garbage a lot too. You're room also smells like vomit mixed with air freshner sometimes." He states.

I look away. I didn't want to hear this. This..this was horrible. He found out. Now I'd never be good enough. I felt tears slide down my face. I tried quickly to wipe them away but it was no use , Sess had already seen.

"It'll be alright, little brother" He soothes. Thinking my tears are ones of sadness due to my actions.

"No , it won't be , how am I supposed to get strong and skinny, and perfect like a regular demon, when I'm a pathetic Hanyou!" I spat. His eyes widened at my words and then he look at me. I mean really looked at me.

He saw my fat. The horrible fatness. The failure.

* * *

Sess's P.O.V

I looked at my little brother and I truly saw him.

I frowned sadly.

He was skinny , too skinny. His eyes were sunken in, like a skeleton. His bones were noticable through the thin sheet cover. I then looked away and I felt a tear prick my eye. I scoffed inwardly. This Sesshomauru shouldn't show tears? Should he?

I felt it slide down my face. He was worse then Rin. My beautiful Rin , had the same thing happen to her. I wonder why they have those thoughts that plague their minds. My Rin was beautiful, kind, lovely. all around a wonderful girl. Then she cut herself and starved herself. She tried killing herself. I was devastated then, and she was only my girlfriend, my best friend.

This was my brother...my little brother. He was annoying at times. He also was indeed a Hanyou, but I eventually got over that. I just am not a very emotional person. I guess...I didn't show how much I loved him.

I took Inuyasha's hand. I grasped it firmly and gave it a light squeeze, as I said.

"I will help you, in any way like I did for Rin. I am not an emotional person..this Sesshomauru...But I do care for you little brother. I don't want to see you waste away. Not if I can help it. " I said strongly.

* * *

Inuyasha's P.O.V

My brother...just said he cares for me? But he's a demon. I struggled with the concept of him accepting me as family. It just didn't make sense. Why...would he?

I felt my shoulders shake and then I pulled Sess into a hug and started to sob in his arms. Instead of rejecting me like I feared, he pulled me even closer to him and tried to get me to calm down. I felt so vulnerable but I couldn't pull away. It felt too good.

As we were in the middle of talking the door clicked open and there stood a disheveled weeping girl.

"Kagome..." I whispered.

* * *

Kagome's P.O.V

I knew I looked horrible but that didn't matter. As soon as I heard he was in the hospital I ran straight to him. I burst through his door. Him and his brother were sitting there talking, I felt tears slide down my face. I thought he didn't like his brother, but here they are talking. I smiled. Maybe they worked out their issues.

I pulled up another chair next to Inuyasha. I stared at him. I saw how skinny he really was. How sunken in his eyes were.

"Inuyasha..." I whispered quietly. He shushed me and held a finger to my lips and I smiled a small smile as I felt tears fall down my face.

"What happened." I asked even though I pretty much knew the answer.

"He has been starving himself. And purging when he eats." said a tired and sad sounding Sesshomaru.

I felt my heart skip a beat. This boy was starving himself. I start to think of when we first met how insecure he was. How he never ate at lunch. How he seemed very nervous and jumpy. But I also remember when he would let his guard down and his smirk would show up on those lips of his, and his smile. His laugh that seemed to be contagious.

Inuyasha was so skinny. I looked at him and he was extremely bony and his eyes didn't have any light. His skin was weak and thin. He looked...

Dead.

He put his hand to my cheek and caught my falling tears.

"Please...don't cry Kagome. I don't like to see such a look on your face." He whispered.

"You're going to get help right?" I asked. I needed to know he'd be alright.

Another person entered the room and it was girl. She was petite and very pretty. Her brown eyes showed such determination and light. She smiled at Sess as he gave her a big smile and pulled her into his arms. I smiled. They must be dating.

"This is my girlfriend, Rin." He introduced us.

She smiled and shook my hand. She grabbed a little too high and my sleeve slipped, and I winced. She seemed confused till she looked at my long sleeves, and she turned extremely pale. She recovered fast and then spoke.

"Hey Yasha, It's Rin! I finally got out of Alexian!" She said enthusiatically as she hugged him.

He hugged her back and smiled.

"That's great Rin."

She smiled and then turned serious.

"Inuyasha...I have spoken with the doctors...and they think it'd be best...if you left for Alexian as soon as possible. " She said softly and soothingly.

I saw him have a slight panic, but he looked at Sess, then her, and then me. His eyes got this sudden light, this sudden fire in them.

"I will go...I don't want to disappoint you all." He said softly.

"You wouldn't disappoint , you just need some help." Rin said calmly.

She started explaining everything that goes on there trying to reassure him it'd be fine. How everything is only there to try and help you. He nodded , I noticed he started feeling better and I smiled at him. He was going to get better.

"Yes, they have an excellent Eating Disorder / and Self-harm program. They really helped me. I looked at her questioningly and then she lifted up her sleeves to show me. Sess left the room, saying he had to go to the bathroom, but I knew he left because of what he saw.

Her arms were riddled with scars. It was scary how deep some were. They were even deeper than mine. She gave a sad smile towards me.

"Yes, I was a cutter, and yes I had an Eating Disorder. I still am both those things. They will never leave me, but I know I have other options then returning to my old ways. I...know Kagome, that you also self-harm don't you?" she askes softly.

"Yes." i whisper , ashamed.

"Don't be ashamed. Their battles scars, they tell you went through some harships. But now your hardships are ending. I will talk to the doctor, and see if you both can go. You both need help, and I want to help and do anything in my power to do so."

I didn't know what to say. How to feel. I could get help? Together with Inuyasha. We could be better.

We could be saved.

"I will only go...if Kagome comes with me." states Inuyasha. He looks at me with sad eyes. I look away for a moment and bite my lip. I know he wants me to be better...but the question is...Do I want to get better?

I know I only have one option now.

"Yes...We'll do this together." I say smiling. Rin nods and giggles and gives us all hugs. Rin was just about to leave , when Inuyasha suddenly turns extremely pale.

He starts to hyperventilate and shake. Rin rushes off to get the doctor, I start to panic and try to calm him down, thinking he's just having a panic attack.

"Inuyasha! Calm Down!"

I am pushed aside as Doctors flood all around him. Rin trys to pull me back. I try and fight her but I am crying to hard to really put up a fight.

"He stopped breathing." says a doctor.

They start to do CPR. That doesn't work and then they get out the shock things, like you see on tv.

"Unresponsive." yells a nurse.

I start to sob harder and a nurse escorts me and Rin outta the room. Sess comes around with a coffee, he sees me sobbing uncontrolaby and Rin crying softly et trying to comfort me at the same time.

He drops his coffee and comes over to us.

"What's wrong?" He asks quickly , i can see the fear in his eyes.

"He stopped breathing" Rin chokes out.

A doctor comes out with a grim expression.

"I'm sorry he is gone."

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**This is after all a tradgedy fic...someone needed to die...I'm crying as I write this. There will be two endings though. The original ( The next chapter) and the alternate( The tenth chapter)**

**This will be my first finished fanfic. **

**God...I am such a terrible person...but I wanted it to ring true with what could happen in a real situation. People die from ED's all the time. It's sad...but very true. I know many people who have been on the brink of death from them. I am so terribly sorry for all who have suffered.**

**Moment of silence for them...**

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**I will most likely edit the chapters in the end, to add more or fix errors. Make it more "Finished." **


	9. Chapter 9

**Here is the original ending.**

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****The End

Kagome's P.O.V

It has been 1 year since he died. I always think about him. He always used to say I was his light...But little did he know he was mine as well. I was starting to fall for him. I knew I had only known him for maybe a month, but it was the best month of my life. He knew exactly what to say, he cared about me.

Another thing was he wasn't scared or freaked out by my scars and cuts. He accepted them and tried to help me.

I wish he knew, I liked him back...

After he passed I didn't know what to do. After the doctor said those dreaded words...

"I'm sorry he's gone."

I lost all hope. I sat there in Rin's arms crying and shuddering. It didn't do much good because she was sobbing as well, and her shoulders were shaking as each sob racked her body. Just like mine. Sesshomauru stood there emotionless for a minute, it's like he couldn't process that his brother was gone.

"Impossible" he said at the time.

I remember him storming in his room, and seeing him.

Seeing his cold body lie there motionless. Rin tried shielding my eyes but, I wanted to see. I needed proof just like Sesshomauru. I stumbled to the bedside and grasped his cold limp hand.

"Inuyasha..." I whispered hoarsely. His eyes were open and dead. I carefully closed them as tears still cascaded down my cheeks.

He was gone.

So I pressed my lips to his, as I whispered a goodbye.

It's hard to believe it has been a year. Remembering isn't easy, but it isn't too hard either. Every day gets easier and the pain is dulling to a small throbbing ache in my heart.

It may have been a year since he passed. But it has been 10 months since I discovered the letter.

The letter that simple-handedly changed my life.

_Dear Kagome,_

_I don't know if you will ever get this letter._

_But I am writing it anyways. _

_For years I have struggled with my self-image, because of my half-demon status_

_I always felt inferior._

_Unloved._

_Ugly._

_Fat._

_Imperfect._

_But then I met you. _

_You taught me how to smile again._

_How to laugh again._

_How to enjoy life._

_How to have great friends. _

_But most importantly..._

_You taught me how to love. _

_You...showed me love and kindness._

_When all that I showed you at first..._

_Was Hate and Disbelief._

_You...You are my light._

_I treasure you, Kagome._

_So please, with this letter I am asking you._

_No._

_I am pleading with you._

_Please get help._

_I will talk to my friend Rin._

_She is leaving a hospital for self-harm. _

_She will help you._

_My Light._

_My Friend._

_My Love._

_I will save you. _

_Because you deserve _

_To Be Saved_

_Love,_

_ Inuyasha _

__I remember when I found it, lying in a heap of messy papers. As I read it, of course I had started to cry. He thought so much of me.

He loved me.

His love gave me the strength to show Rin and Sesshomauru the letter.

Rin and I agreed it would be for the best, if I checked into Alexian Mental Hospital. I thought of it as his last wish for me.

The hardest thing was telling my mother.

She didn't believe me at first, but once I showed her my scars, she immediately agreed. I could tell she was upset she didn't know but it wasn't her fault.

I was then soon packed, and on my way.

I have been here since.

But now I am about to leave.

I have been clean for 10 months and was deemed ready to start my life again, healthier this time of course.

The only thing sad about leaving is that Rin and Sess are the only ones that still talk to me. Sango and Roku...I was too much for them I guess.

Roku just never spoke to me again.

Sango was upset and sympathetic at first. Then it turned to pity. She wrote fewer and fewer letters, and eventually they just stopped.

I am saddened they aren't my friends anymore.

But were they really even my friends, if because I needed help for something as destructive as self-harm and they didn't support me in my recovery?

Real friends care.

I finish packing the last of my bags and I smile triumphantly.

Finished.

Rin is outside waiting for me; she said she has big news for me.

I think I hear wedding bells?

"Come on Kags!" Yells a smiling Rin, as she grabs the last of my bags.

"Sess is going to be cranky, if we don't eat soon!"

I laughed and nodded. I needed a minute.

I looked around my room and walked to the door way. I gave my room one last glance as I slowly shut the door. I then laughed and sprinted to the car, happy I was finally going home.

As we both got in the car and she began to drive away, I smiled as a tear, a happy one mind you, slowly dripped down my cheek.

I grabbed the letter, I always keep in my pocket and hugged it to my chest.

I really was meant to be saved.

* * *

**I thought this was a splendid ending. **

**Sad, but with a bit of happy. :)**

**Let me know if you want me to post the Alternate Ending. **

**Or if you are satisfied with this one.**

**Thank you all for reading and reviewing. **

**It really has been fun, this has been great therapy for me as well. **

**If you have any suggestions on any other issues, or want me to do another story like this please let me know! :) **

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**By the way, I have gone 2 months and 1 week, without self-harming. **

**Anyone can pull through, feel free to PM me, even just to chat. It's a great distraction.**


	10. Chapter 10

**I have been asked to post the alternate ending...I have to write it once again...because it got deleted. **

**So bare with me! **

**Here you go TheNinjaKitty13! And to everyone else that may want an alternate ending.**

**Inuyasha did not die, this is a year later with him alive!**

* * *

****An Alternate End

I can't believe it's been a year since that day.

Since the day, Inuyasha almost left my life completely.

That day was one of the most single-handedly terrifying days of my life. I almost lost him.

Since that day we have been at Alexian, thanks to Rin. She sends us letters and writes to us constantly. Even Sess sends us his love from time to time. He and Inuyasha have gotten very close, I think sometimes it takes a heart-wrenching tragedy to bring people closer together.

Speaking of closer together, Inuyasha asked me to be his girlfriend 11 months ago. It would have been 12 but he was so weak, and he said he wanted to say it with a strong clear voice. I remember when he asked me.

_Flashback_

_"You know Kagome...I wrote you a letter." Inuyasha said, the day before we left for Alexian. I smiled at him and felt a blush creep on my cheeks._

_"Oh really, and what did this letter say?" I said, giving him a cheeky smile. _

_He smirked and intertwined his fingers in my hair. _

_"Nothing much, except well that I love you Kagome. I Love you with all my heart. You...are my light. You saved me from the eternal darkness I felt. I know we have only known each other for a short while. But baby, you...you rebuilt me into who I am today. And we're going to Alexian tomorrow and we are going to get the help we need and deserve... he paused then gave me a small kiss on my tear covered cheek. _

_We were meant to be saved" He finished. I nodded and wrapped my arms around his neck._

_"I love you, Inuyasha" I said happily. He smirked as he bent down and our lips finally touched._

_Once we broke the passionate kiss, that I swear lit my soul on fire, he asked with a dazzling fangy smile._

_"Kagome, will you be my light?" He whispered in my ear. I felt his hot breath and my head swirled._

_"I already am." I whispered back. _

_End Flashback_

__I touched my lips as I remembered that first kiss. That amazing feeling of being loved all shared through a simple touch of the lips.

The past 11 months have been hard, but our relationship and bond has only gotten stronger.

There are days when I want to cut and I scream and scream feeling so utterly crazy and mad, I don't know how I survive. But then those are the days Inuyasha holds me in my room. Where he whispers how much I mean to him. Where he reminds me how much of an effect I have on him and the people around me.

There are also days for him, where he doesn't want to eat, where he is scared of gaining the weight. When he feels the need to purge.

We aren't perfect, No one is. We're average people leading a life where we have made many mistakes, too many to count. We know our flaws and faults but we don't pay mind, because we have our family and most importantly we have each other.

I haven't cut for 12 months. My scars are still there the doctors say they most likely will always be there. I like to think of them as battle scars, they show I had some hardships. But I'm here. I'm still alive and now I'm happy. I will always be a self-harmer. It's not something I can stop being. I will always be considered one, no matter how many years pass and there are no fresh cuts. I will forever be a "Cutter". But that doesn't define me.

I am Kagome.

Inuyasha hasn't purged since he was admitted. He used to weight 65 llbs. He now weighs a healthy and astounding 135 llbs. He now eats healthily and works out a normal amount. Like with mine, he will always be under the category of anorexic/bullmiac. But it doesn't define him.

He is Inuyasha.

I stare our the window of my room, staring at the trees blowing in the breeze.

Rin and Sess are on their way to pick us up. We're going out to eat and they said they have news for us.

I think I hear wedding bells!

Speaking of friends, Miroku and Sango don't talk to us anymore. We became too much for them to handle, I guess. It's a sad prospect, but they were never really our friends, if they didn't support us getting better.

My mom is excited to have me back, she has promised to not nag me about my weight and said her attitude has changed dramatically. I can't wait to hug her. I miss her hugs, she didn't know what she was saying hurt, she tried to help like any other parent.

Inuyasha walks into my room , with his dazzling smirk and runs up to me and spins me around in a total cliche movie moment. I giggle and playfully nip at his ear.

"Rin's here!" He says excitedly. I smile brightly and he returns it. He grabs my bags and we walk out the door to their car, and see Sess and Rin smiling and waving. Rin dashes over to us and pulls us into bone-crushing hugs.

"LET'S GO!" She screams happily. We both laugh at her happiness and Sess gives us both hugs, which I thought was very shocking, in a totally amazing way.

"Come on let's go eat before Sesshy here gets cranky!" She laughs.

"Hnn" He says with amusement clearly in his eyes.

As we pile into the car and drive away I can't help but think to myself the words Inuyasha told me long ago that I will forever remember, as he cuddles into me, contently.

"We were meant to be saved."

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**HAPPY TEARS GUYS!**

**Now I am officially done with this story! :) **

**I'm glad you guys have been with me through this short story. It's been fun, interesting, and sad to write all at the same time. **

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**I know only a short time ago, I posted the orignal ending I said I had gone two months without self-harm.**

**Sadly...this Saturday I had a relapse. I am okay though! No worries! It wasn't deep or anything, but it was enough to lead me into my old way of thinking. **

**I always love PM's and I will always respond and it's a wonderful distraction also! Don't be afraid to PM me! I don't bite!**

**I have 2 other stories up and running! **

**Awakening and Military Girl( My new story that I just posted today!) **

**I love you all3 **

**~TaylorRiley17**


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